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Ed Helms

The Office staffer and Daily Show vet logs a hard day's work -- and a few thousand calories.
Ed Helms

BREAKFAST

My mom is a health nut, so as a kid, I ate nothing but berries and twigs. Naturally, when I left home I rebelled -- it was all Cap'n Crunch, all the time. I'm 33 now, and my body is starting its own rebellion. But what can I do? On the set of The Office, we have some of the best catering I've ever seen. They make whatever you want. It's deadly! I start the day with some coffee and good, old-fashioned scrambled eggs and bacon. Sometimes, I ask for cheddar in the eggs, just for extra cholesterol. If I'm feeling particularly decadent, which is always, I'll add a doughnut and some fresh fruit.

LUNCH

Ah, lunch. How I love lunch. It's a very social time at The Office. The whole cast and crew eat together cafeteria-style. And oh, man, catering pulls out the big guns for lunch. It's not uncommon to find king crab legs, a pasta station, some barbecue ribs and then some fancy entrée I've never even heard of. The salad bar is like the produce section of a supermarket. I don't bother choosing. I just eat all of it. To drink, I make my own Arnold Palmer -- heavy on the tea, light on the lemonade (I'm from Georgia; we like our tea). Dessert is more of a "sugar-oriented auxiliary lunch." Mine typically consists of fresh, gooey chocolate chip cookies mashed up into vanilla ice cream. Did I mention I gained nine pounds during my first three months on the show?

DINNER

By the time dinner rolls around, I've already left the set, and thank goodness for that! After work, I jog or ride my bike -- social outings are rare during production because our call times are early, and we're on set for 10 to 12 hours. So I'm left to my own devices for dinner, which I handle by turning to the devices of others: takeout. If I'm feeling saucy, I go Italian. If I'm feeling fresh, I get sushi. Tonight, I'm feeling spicy, so I'll probably go for some Thai chicken peanut curry and a Corona. But sometimes I just feel lazy. And you know what that means: dinner with my ol' buddy, Cap'n Crunch.

 

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